Who am I (I’m Julie Lawrence, hi!), and why listen to me?
Mostly, I hope you’d want to listen to me because I make sense to you, and because it makes you feel better – more self-connected, more gentle with yourself.
In terms of qualifications – I’ve been training in nonviolent communication, created by Dr Marshall Rosenberg, since 2011, and teaching it since 2012, in face to face workshops, and now online.
I have a passion for psychology, especially the work of Sarah Peyton and Dan Seigel (both interpersonal neurobiologists), and for frameworks such as Inner Relationship Focusing (similar to Internal Family Systems), the work of Byron Katie, and the Enneagram.
What I teach comes from not just from “learning”, but from applying many great teachings in my life, and my direct experience of that – what works and what doesn’t, and how to adapt it if necessary. It’s backed by science AND experience.
I’m mildly Aspergers, have ADHD, am a sober alcoholic (since 2011) and have struggled with major depression from the age of 13. In finding answers to my issues, I’ve tried pretty much All The Things, so I can tell you a LOT about what helps, and why, and how.
I help you make sense of things … of things that have happened to you, or of what other people are saying and doing, or how you’re thinking about something.
I help reframe, change perspective.
I offer practical and useful frameworks, different ways to see things.
I teach the wisdom of no defence. That defence is always* attack. That vulnerability is the safest place to be. *[I’m NOT talking about things like sexual or physical abuse here! Please keep yourself safe, to the best of your ability! I’m talking about the 99% of time that our negatively-biased thoughts and filters tell us we’re under attack.]
I teach self-connection – which is what we REALLY want, not the myths of happiness and positive thinking – and self-compassion.
I teach authenticity.
I teach trauma awareness, and gentleness with ourselves around our precious and painful dysfunctions.
I teach win/win
I teach speaking up and speaking out
I teach “no wonder”, and “you make sense”
I teach “being with”, not fixing
I teach that it’s not your fault – AND that it’s your responsibility. And that the kind of responsibility I’m talking about is actually freedom.
I teach by modelling all these things – vulnerability, compassion, connection, authenticity, courage.
I teach by telling my own stories.
I teach by being IN there with you, fighting the same battles.
I believe in people’s inherent “goodness” – by which I mean, no-one is out there intentionally trying to hurt you, they’re trying to manage there own stuff. That doesn’t mean you don’t get caught in the cross-fire … but the pain is less when you’re not telling yourself they’re trying to kill you.
I believe in people wanting to give, in preferring love, when given the choice, and the ability to choose it.
To set the world on fire.
Enough people using NVC well, that it changes the world,